6.09.2008

flirting with a law suit

Occasionally I will get emails like this with an apologetic shrug from my agents. It will say, "hey, if you HAPPEN to know anyone..." then this breakdown, or the specs for the type they're casting for.

This one is sort of horrifying and hilarious.
Perhaps if I take out the name of their very popular drug they won't sue my pants.

Male, 49-60yrs. Open on race. An “everyman” Must have had a heart attack and is currently using _________!!!! Still somewhat fit, can do copy (see attached). So, basically if they haven’t had a heart attack over 45yrs, not using ____ and can’t do light physical sports we shouldn’t see them.
What if they just sort of wheeze? Should we send over our wheezers? We have one guy who had chest pains and went to the hospital two years ago, but it turned out to be a false alarm, and another who had a mild seizure. Should we send them over?
PLEASE SEND AN EMAIL OUT TO ALL POSSIBLE WOMAN AND CHOICES THAT YOUR REPRESENT TO SEE IF THEY HAVE HAD A HEART ATTACK AND USING THE PRODUCT
I'm not going to nail them for grammar because I know this was written in a hurry, but 'all possible woman' is a great phrase. Hey, have you had a heart attack? Number one we have an audition for you; number two, that's too bad and we hope you're okay.
Hilarious.
Obviously this is a difficult thing to cast for. It’s a great booking, please send the email out to your talent.
No shit. I was working at my agency when they booked a guy for a drug commercial and wanted him to seem as authentic as possible, so they did what's called a "complete media buyout" so you wouldn't cry at his cancer survival commercial, then see him hawking Chevys when you changed the channel. I don't know the final figure, but it was around 55k. They essentially paid him not to work. Amazing.
*****THEY MUST HAVE HAD A HEART ATTACK AND WERE PRESCRIBED ______!
Dude! We get it! Thank you!
*****!

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