what is this "forty-hour-week" of which you speak? This "paid vacation" and this "401(k)"?

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In the dream, I stunned friends and family alike by announcing my decision to go into the military.

My reasons were logical. Fed up with acting, I wanted stability, more money, and a retirement program. I wanted something safe and dependable. And I knew the military would take me.

No one believed I would do it, even as I had my grandparents drive me to the recruitment center to sign up then get immediately shipped out to boot camp. I promised them: I was absolutely serious. Acting wasn't worth it. I was ready for something easier.

Then, as the first person handed me the first clipboard to fill out the first form, I realized what utter morons were running the office, how much I would hate taking stupid orders from them, and realized what a horrible, stupid idea the whole thing was.

...Then I woke up and started thinking again about what job I could possibly find that will be give me stability, more money, and a retirement program.

oops. Hi. I am still here.

I had the best Christmas I can remember.
Wii, snow, homemade sushi, calm, nice, warm, good.

Apparently all it takes is avoiding your family!


it's a new day

I woke up for the first time in weeks without something huge hanging over my head.

  • The benefit I produced is over.  We made a night of honest-to-goodness good theater and raised a very decent chunk of money. 
  • My Monday night show is over.  It was a great run and we went out on a fantastic show. 
  • My Cirque audition is over, for better or for worse. It was a struggle and yesterday was tough and involved some ... personal growth, but overall these things will only teach you patience and humility.

Today: a quick voice-over audition, then Christmas shopping and soothing housecleaning. Ahh.
I'll just make some coffee and check my email.

Oh, you with the timing, universe/groupon/hotmail.


Number 94 fell swiftly, friends.

from my cousin Genevra's blog:
One of my favorite quotes, which found me a few months ago, is based on a Japanese Proverb:

Fall seven times. Stand up eight.

Earlier today I was not so much ready to stand up again as I was ready to spend the rest of my life face-down on the fucking ground so I would never have to deal with the falling again.


oh, by the way.

I'm producing a benefit.  You can see Beowulf vs. Grendel at it.
Here it is.
Please come.
It will be very good theater.  It's the kind of theater that makes me want to do theater. And I am DAMN picky about theater. Why do you think I never write about anything I go see on this blog? Because I usually have little that is nice to say, that's why.
Look, I even made the poster all by myself with a 1976 version of Photoshop. Click on it to make it big enough to be readable.

quelle nuit.
It's okay. I know I spelled that wrong. My French is awful, functional and entirely self-taught, so .. you know.
tal cosa.
Brandon's grandfather died tonight.
My friends, my cousins who have already suffered so deeply, suffered another loss.

I guess I'll pray that I can be of comfort.



It's for reals:
I have an audition for Cirque du Soleil.


The way I understand it, they start off with a lot of people in the morning, then cut them down as the day goes on. I figure I'll probably be home by lunch, if not a late-morning nap.  Nonetheless, I gotta swing for the fences (wherein "fences" = "6:00, when the day-long audition officially ends").

I have to prepare a 2-minute piece to sell myself to them.

Dread. Paralyzing. Dread.

My Argentinian pen pal, Gabriela, is teaching me lunfardo, which is Argentinian slang.  She wrote:
Aquí llamamos "cagazo" al miedo y "cagón" a quien tiene miedo.
I'm going to very loosely translate this as:
Here we call being scared a "shit attack" and "massive shitter" is the person who is scared.
This 2 minute piece is a serious shit attack, guys.
Oh man, how I love language.
Oh man, how the F do I come up with 2 minutes where I am strongly discouraged from using any of it?

Why People Hate Actors

From an interview with Alec Baldwin, in which he states that he'll quit acting for television and film after he finishes 30 Rock:
“The goal of movie-making is to star in a film where your performance drives the film, and the film is either a soaring critical or commercial success, and I never had that.”
Maybe you never had that because that goal is some unbelievably egotistical sheeeeit.