I guess I could try to make this about something bigger, but I may as well skip the boring allegory. Here's what happened: my real-life-flesh-and-blood cousin just lost her 6 month old baby, who was shaken to death by my cousin's (hopefully ex by now) boyfriend.
Everyone in the family keeps trying to find a logic for it. For example, my mother keeps reminding me that the (hopefully ex by now) boyfriend has a lot of tattoos. Or, tonight "that poor girl doesn't need anyone pointing fingers at her right now, but she really made some bad choices." My grandmother insisted she didn't have her address, pointedly stating that "I have no idea what her name even is anymore." (My reaction seems to be avoiding the situation by pointing out my mothers' bad behavior.)
In my brain as I do housework and think about my poor poor cousin, who also lost her father just 6 months back: fair and unfair.
About the tragedy itself.
About people's reactions to the tragedy.
About what we can and can't control and why we respond how we do.
My metaphorical-larger-sense cousin Scott lost someone earlier this year. Emotions run high. Old grudges surface. He said 'there is a window of time where anyone is allowed to say anything, and it has to be okay. You chalk it up to grief.'
I think that's fair. Sort of a supreme fairness.
It doesn't help my cousin much right now, though. Neither does my stupid card. Or the nightmare I had last night where I witnessed miles and miles of slaughter and carnage and could do nothing but cry and keep walking.
hi, welcome back to my blog, my trip was nice.